it all makes sense.
You can connect the dots.
You understand why certain things happened.
And you would have it no other way.
Only in retrospect.
But does it have to be this way?
Couldn’t you simply appreciate this moment though you didn’t understand it?
I used to hurry through life.
Ever desiring to fast-forward and skip to the good parts.
I wanted to be 16, then 18, then 21.
Always on the run for the next meal, next person, next break, next vacation, next semester, next year, next opportunity, next job.
In desperation for next … I lost the present.
Always groping but never finding.
But this semester I found it, by God’s grace.
For what seems to be the first time in a long time, I was content, where I was, who I was with, and with my present and current circumstances.
I was fully in the present - relishing and treasuring everything and everyone in my life.
I was going sleepless, with tons of assignments, projects, events, work while trying to graduate with a newborn baby.
In times before, I would’ve wished myself out of the present condition - and would’ve hurried through everything that was going on.
But this time it was different. I wanted to fully taste, experience and see where I was, who I was with and what I was going through.
And now that the semester’s over, with graduation around the corner with a 40-day-old baby Enoch - I praise God for the contentment in my heart and the serenity in my soul.
And no longer do I need a “retrospect” to understand what happened - I fully gained understanding by choosing to live in the present.