A woman that will submit to be ever dictated to in the smallest matters of domestic life, who will yield up her identity, will never be of much use or blessing in the world, and will not answer the purpose of God in her existence.

She is a mere machine to be guided by another’s will and another’s mind.

God has given each one, men and women, an identity, an individuality, that they must act in the fear of God for themselves.

- Letter 25, 1885

When we don’t know who we are, we find it hard to know what we should be doing.

Therefore, when we don’t know who we are, we become slaves to our feelings. The momentary emotions we feel begin to dominate our lives, and we become what we’re feeling at that moment.

When we don’t know who we are, we become entrapped by our circumstance.

The world defines us, our lives become reactive to whatever is happening around us, and we become more frustrated as the ups and downs of life govern us.

We get confused and life becomes complicated when we don’t know who we are.

The problem has always been and always will be “not knowing ourselves”.

I used to ask a lot of “what if” questions.  

• What if I wasn’t born a PK?
• What if I wasn’t born into this family?  
• What if I didn’t go to Korea?
• What if I didn’t go to the Korean Army?
• What if I stayed in US?

Useless but yet tempting questions to ponder from time to time.  To imagine where you’d be if you hadn’t or if you had.  If you didn’t or did.  

But there I was, on the highest elevation point in Shenandoah Valley with Iris in my arms overlooking the magnificent beauty and glory of Shenandoah & Appalachia.  

My heart stopped.

Time stood still.

And it was there & then, that I knew from the core of my being that I was indeed exactly where God planned for me to be.    

Then, it hit me.  There was a better question that I needed to ask.  

What if all this, here & now, everything I am (or am not) and all that I have (or don’t have) is the result of God’s providential leading for my life?  

Many times I tempted to question, doubt, ponder and think about all the things I’m missing out in life.  All the things that I may be enjoying if I hadn’t made certain choices in life.  

But on top of that Valley I realized for the first time in my life, I’m fully seizing & enjoying ALL OF THIS, HERE & NOW because God has providentially led me to all of this here and now.  

• All the detours
• All the loss of time
• All the rejections
• All the seemingly useless & trivial training
• All the painful memories

With all that I am (am not), everything I have (don’t have), I thank God for His leading & guidance. 

For such a time as this, I had been strategically chosen by God to take the detours and arrive here at this particular point of my life to fulfill His purpose for our generation.  

I believe with all my heart that it is this paradigm, this perspective we need to restore & re-capture in our lives.  

We can wonder, envy, complain and talk about how bad we have it compare to others.  We can drown in our regrets and constantly replay all the dumbest mistakes we’ve made in our lives to end up here & now with all this.  

Or, we can shift our focus to the goodness & faithfulness of God who has stuck with us since day 1 and have been shaping & molding us for His greater purpose He has for us.  

We can open our eyes with wonder and be thankful for all that we are & with all that we have now.  

The choice is ours.

Where are you?  

Are you thankful?  Or are you seething with anger, mixed in with regret & envy?

Could it be possible that “thankfulness” is the key to a brighter & greater future?